After the Apology, What Now?

6-8 years

Me with Others

20 min / 2x per week

Learning goal :

Learning to Be Happy in a Group

Pedagogical Intention :

Ability to Forgive (Accepting Apologies)

Target skills :

Forgiveness vs. reconciliation, Trust-rebuilding, Behavioral repair over time

Materials :

Relationship repair planning cards, trust-rebuilding protocol

Detailed procedure :

1. Introduction: "Forgiving someone doesn't automatically put everything back the way it was. Trust has to be rebuilt - and that takes time and consistent behavior."
2. Distinguish: forgiveness (internal) vs. reconciliation (relational - optional and earned).
3. Trust-rebuilding: what does the person who hurt you need to do - consistently and over time - for trust to return?
4. Script: "Forgiveness is the door opening. Rebuilding trust is the walk through the house."
5. Practice: design a trust-rebuilding plan for a scenario - what specific behaviors, over what time period?

Progress Indicators :

Distinguishes forgiveness from reconciliation correctly. Designs a trust-rebuilding plan with specific behaviors. Identifies when reconciliation is and isn't appropriate.

Research Foundations :

Enright (2000); Worthington (2006); Gottman (1994)