When Everyone Says You Should
TARGET:
6-8 years
INTENSITY:
20 min / 2x per week
LEARNING GOAL
Learning to Be Happy in a Group
PEDAGOGICAL INTENTION
Ability to Set Personal Limits (Saying No)
Target SKILLS
Socio-emotional Intelligence
Co-Intelligence Human-Human
Agency and Autonomy
MATERIALS
Peer pressure scenario vignettes
Limit-holding scripts
DETAILED PROCEDURE
Gather the whole group together in a circle for this activity. Explain calmly to the children: "The hardest limits to hold are the ones your friends are testing. That's exactly when they matter most."
Step 1
Use these scenarios: your group is doing something that makes you uncomfortable / a friend keeps asking until you say yes / you get labeled as 'too serious' for having limits.
Step 2
Script for limit-holding under pressure: 'I hear you - and I'm still not going to.' / 'I get that you disagree - and my answer is still no.'.
Step 3
Say gently to the children: "'No' that holds under pressure is worth ten times more than a 'no' no one tests."
Step 4
Role play: hold a limit through 3 escalating rounds of pressure.
Step 5
Step 6
Step 7
Step 8
Step 9
Step 10
PROGRESS INDICATORS
The child holds a stated limit through 3 escalation rounds in a role play.
The child uses the 'I hear you AND' structure.
The child reports a situation this week where they held a limit they would previously have caved on.